Gentleman of the Month

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Written by J. Thayer

lyrics

GENTLEMAN OF THE MONTH

I need an older man in my life
giving me good advice
he’s like: cut down on the late nights
and don’t’ get hung up like Christ
on some kind smile, and nice tights on thick thighs

What the fuck?
cancel my membership to gentleman of the month club
now im a dumb cunt
calling women dumb stuff
i kick myself in the nuts

I kick myself in the nuts
this coffee and club and cutting it, uh
15 months oughta be enough
still drinking cyanide up
calling out for another before i finish my cup
sad as fuck and i just want to feel your thighs up
lonely as fuck and i just want to fill your thighs up
with my cum
pull your tights up
and wait nine months
uh
well fuck a hook, fuck you and those other crooks
These days I cop a brain, never fazed, never shook
you left and i adjusted the that i took
sip straight out the handle
black out, wake up eat some tramydol
pass out, throw up, eat some tramydol
on the couch, broke up, eating tramydol
dead drunk, ship sinking eating tramydol just to handle it all

Don’t you remember you told me you love me baby?
Xo infinity, live with me, speak about having kids with me
or we could just fuck and watch T.V. approach this casually
but actually I’m attatched to the seems
of your jeans, I fold your clothes neatly
and kneeling burnt offering of your socks


ooowwwhhhhaaackhl
sick as fuck, still drinking enough
to eat my insides up
red wine
antioxidants

now i’m calling it art,
staying starved,
singing for some other half of my heart


Oooh I need you more and more
put you in my body drawer

take 3 showers a day (just to clean off my dick
trying to figure out which one’s my main
and which ones my side chick)
pick the one with the child bearing hips
nah, you already know that’s a wash, my fucking prerequisite

one of these women is straight, shit
she hates it when I’m wasted
she can taste it when i’m high
so i abide, i hide
sipping fifths of mouth wash in the pantry
while she makes me eggs in her panties
nah, I didn’t even try for that double entendre,
im not trying for a baby, baby

fucking you would be incredible
unprotected would be better girl

now i’m listening to townes van zandt
now i’m lifting my collapsed pants
from a carpet of condom wrappers
whiskey glasses, last
night’s trash

i’m trashed
off my ass and ambling around
put me in your body ground

credits

from Bummer Summer, released April 20, 2014
Vocals and instrumentation: Jason Thayer

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XO∞ Chicago, Illinois

C U when I get there, 2017. So soon. So soon.

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